By Rene Villard-Reid
Part 1 appeared in the May/June issue
Jeff walked into my healing room on a late September afternoon. It had
been about seven years since our paths had crossed. Now, he was a
mature man in his forty-fifth year of life. He was the epitome of success,
dressed in a pin striped suit, silk tie and Armani shoes. His cheeks had the
high color of a person who enjoys regular games of golf and the sunny
outdoors. He was apparently doing quite well.
As we greeted each other amiably, I gazed at him admiringly and asked, “Are you still with the same firm?”
With a smile he said, “Yes, as a matter of fact, I am. At present, I am the Junior Vice President.”
“Well, well. I’m impressed,” I responded appreciatively and then, “Good for you! So, what brings you here, Jeff?”
With unexpected directness, he said “I was recently diagnosed with prostate cancer. The doctors believe it’s metastasized to my bone marrow and potentially to my brain as my vision has become blurred. They have given me five months to live.”
Trying too late to keep my face impassive, my eyes betrayed my shock and dismay. It was only then that his expression registered the faintest signs of sadness and then fear.
“I know,” he commented dryly. “It’s quite a shock isn’t it?
Not waiting for my response he went on to say, “I don’t know if you can help me, but I am willing to try anything. As you helped my family once, several years ago, I was hoping maybe you could help again.”
I paused to gather my thoughts. “Jeff, I can’t promise anything as I am only a channel for God’s healing light. Above all things, I trust in that. I know you will be given what you need, keeping in mind that it might not be what you want. Let’s just stay open and receptive.”
He nodded in understanding and carefully removed his jacket. Gesturing to the massage table that I used for my work he asked, “Do I lay down over there?”
“Yes and you might remove your shoes as it will be more comfortable.”
Before beginning, I explained to him what I would be doing and why.
He seemed comfortable with my protocol and the idea of my ritual and signaled that he was ready by closing his eyes.
I did the same and began taking several deep cleansing breaths to center and attune myself to Spirit, while silently offering up prayers for his healing. When I felt that I was in communion and deep connection with my Source, I thoughtfully lit the stick of sage and blew upon it gently, encouraging the flame. It caught quickly and thick smoke swirled around the room. Sage is an intelligent herb that mirrors the intensity of any illness or spiritual disturbance. This case was no different. The room had filled rapidly with the heavy smoke and it wasn’t abating. It certainly reflected the dire situation Jeff was in.
Placing the sage in my abalone shell, I picked up my feather and slowly began blessing and cleansing him by sweeping the smoke across his body. Making broad passes just above his torso, I noticed immediately how difficult it was to bring the feather through his aura. It was very difficult as I pulled and lifted the thick heavy miasma out of the aura. Toiling through Jeff’s energy field, the feather spoke volumes to his physical condition. It took many passes before I was able to whip the feather through and easily lift away the aspects of what was surrounding his body in the ethers. Slowly and surely, the feather was making more room and space for the healing light that would be coming in. The feather, not unlike the sage, is a very strong barometer of physical and spiritual issues.
I worked until the air was charged and electric, the feather cracking and snapping as I effortlessly swept it across his body. When tiny sparks began to fly off the tip with each flick, I knew it was time to begin.
Placing my hands on the tops of his feet, I began to sense where his energy was flowing and where it was blocked.
I had only begun to register a profound receptivity in Jeff’s soul, when the healing energy began pouring rapidly and dramatically into me. A sudden gush and surge charged through me and into Jeff like a river bursting its banks. The intensity was staggering and overwhelming as it thrummed through me. I had no idea what he was feeling, but I was literally rooted to the spot with my hands magnetically adhered to his feet. I couldn’t have moved if I wanted to.
Suddenly the room seemed very bright behind my eyes, so I opened them seeking the source. To my absolute astonishment, the room was bathed in the most ineffable golden light that appeared to be streaming in from all around us.
From what seemed a great distance, I heard Jeff murmuring in awe, “Oh, my God! I can feel this. It is so powerful!”
I glanced up briefly and saw Jeff’s hands raised in receptivity. As this seemed so personal, I closed my eyes quickly and let myself be taken over by the light.
For a long while, I was lost in the experience, my hands magnetically glued to his body as the force of the light flowed relentlessly.
Looking up, I beheld the most beautiful golden angel standing opposite me at the head of the table. As he is like no other, there was no mistaking the stature and radiance of Michael the Archangel in all his shining power and glory.
Utterly grateful and humbled by his presence, tears filled my eyes. Almost immediately, he impressed upon my mind that I was no longer needed and I could break contact when I was ready. He was there now and all would be well.
With exhausted relief, I slowly released my hands and stepped away from the table. In a hushed voice, I briefly made Jeff aware that the healing was continuing without my physical contact and not to be concerned. The energy would release him when it was completed. I did not mention Michael.
As I staggered over to my chair, I glanced at the clock. Forty-five minutes had passed in the blink of an eye. I sat, laid my head on my arms and whispered heartfelt thanks to Michael as I rested in the power of his presence, love and protection.
Shortly thereafter, the air became cooler and lighter. With great effort, I raised my head only to see that Michael was gone. Glancing at Jeff, I saw tears oozing out the corners of his eyes. In that moment, I had no doubt that he had been healed. Slowly blinking and opening his eyes, his arms still raised, he asked in a hushed reverent whisper, “Did you see him? Did you see Michael?”
Numbly staring back, I nodded. “He was incredible and so very awesome. I didn’t realize that you could see him. He loves you so much, my friend.”
He nodded and reaching into his left pocket, withdrew a holy card. On it was the image of Michael the Archangel.
“I never go anywhere without him,” he said as his eyes filled with more tears. “He is my guardian and protector and I have been praying and praying to him to heal me.”
I affirmed, “He heard you. I don’t know if I’ve ever experienced a healing quite like that, Jeff.”
“I’m healed, Rene,” he said with unblinking confidence. “I know it!”
To be continued…
Part 2 appeared in the July/August issue
For an angel of the Lord went down at appointed
seasons into the pool and moved and stirred up the
water; whoever then first, after the stirring up of
the water, stepped in was cured of whatever
disease with which he was afflicted. John 5:4
“I’m healed, Rene,” he said. “I know it!”
Yes, he knew it and I knew it. Seems simple, but few things are ever what they seem.
He reappeared two weeks later with the news we both expected — his tests revealed no cancer. Regardless of the facts, the doctors were mistrustful. In their minds, there was no explanation for the disappearance and it could just as easily reappear. The oncologist as well as several other physicians encouraged Jeff to begin the protocol for prostate cancer as a preventative measure AND he agreed. At the same time, he wanted to continue healing work with me in the same spirit.
By definition, the word prevent means to anticipate. I was amenable to addressing the emotional issue or issues that had created the fertile ground for cancer, but in no way did I see it as preventative.
As long as Jeff thought preventative, he anticipated its return. He was not living in the moment of Love which had blessed him … not just for the moment … but for the rest of his life.
People beg and pray for miracles and yet when the Universe does indeed wink — the ego begins its howling siege as it plants seeds of doubt and fear which sabotage the Truth. With fear having displaced Love, the ultimate healer, there is no room for God or the angels.
Jeff’s attitude so perplexed me I decided to visit my own physician for a reality check. As I’m a medical intuitive, he’d helped me in the past to identify what I saw in a body and would clarify my psychic perceptions. More so, as his father was a hands-on-healer in Iraq, he was familiar with miracles, believed in them and saw them as gifts from God.
When I described the case to him, he grimaced as if he’d tasted something bitter, which was evidenced by what he said next. “He should have picked up his pallet and walked. He should have gotten on his knees and thanked God and gone home. The cancer will return. Maybe not now, but if he pursues these plans, it will return at some time in the future.”
This pronouncement got my attention and as a result sent me to my Bible. I was familiar with the passage but not the entire parable. I found it in John 5: 2-14.
There was a pool called a Bethesda and many sick people would come there ‘waiting for the bubbling up of the water.’ An angel would descend at different times of the year and stir up the water and whoever got into the pool first was healed.
A man who came daily, had suffered from a long, lingering illness, which had lasted thirty-eight years. Jesus noticed him lying helplessly, knowing he’d already been there a long time and asked him, “Do you want to be healed?” In other words, are you really serious about this?
The man complained he’d no one to help him to the pool when the water stirred or if someone did help, others would get in ahead of him.
Jesus didn’t pity the man. He said, “Get up! Pick up your bed and walk!” Instantly the man became well, recovered his strength and did as he was bidden.
Awhile later, Jesus returned and found him there again and said to him, “See, you are well! Stop sinning or something worse may happen to you!”
In Hebrew, the root word of sin means forgetfulness. It’s not about what you’re doing but whether you are conscious or unconscious in your actions. Are you doing something from self remembering or have you forgotten your true self? The true self is whole and complete in spirit and as a child of God.
Jeff wasn’t strong enough in his soul to approach his health in a new perspective, which meant to embody his miracle and allow it to transform and change his life. He needed to pick up his pallet and walk, go and sin no more OR … well the ‘or’ was the cancer which returned five years later and claimed his life — just as the good doctor had predicted.
If he’d put on the new man, his path and outcome would have been entirely different.
How did Jeff forget his true self? Where did he miss the mark? We know he was reasoned out of his experience. Can we blame the doctors for this? Perhaps in part. But there was a deeper problem as I discovered. Jeff didn’t believe he deserved his healing which led to the abandonment of the miracle.
You see, Jeff had two opportunities to be healed. The first was miraculous and any old emotional issues attached to the disease would’ve found resolution in his faith and appreciation in God. He would have acted and moved forward with a renewed sense of himself.
The second opportunity was in his continued healing work for the purpose of addressing the emotional issue connected with the disease.
I’ve had many case histories in which emotional issues once released, caused malignant tumors and cancers to disappear. In Jeff’s case, he had a past marriage, which had emasculated him (prostate cancer), destroyed his self esteem and continued to do so. He’d had a subsequent affair that led to divorce. His ex-wife was embittered, unforgiving and angry. Combined with Jeff’s Catholic beliefs and inherent guilt, she was glad to never let him forget.
Forgiveness of oneself and others is a powerful elixir for healing cancer. As long as guilt and shame fester within the soul, the beauty and wholeness is eroded and will eventually move into the body as disease. For some, it’s easier to die.
Jeff didn’t need his ex-wife’s forgiveness. HE NEEDED TO FORGIVE HIMSELF.
It says in the Course in Miracles that “the unforgiving mind sees no mistakes, but only sins … It wants to live, yet wishes it were dead. It wants forgiveness, yet it sees no hope. It wants escape, yet can conceive of none because it sees the sinful everywhere.”
God doesn’t need to forgive as He already loves us and knows our end from our beginning. But we do need to forgive ourselves and others. To forgive means to no longer hold ourselves or another hostage over a real or perceived hurt. At the core of each and every one of us our soul and spirit remain untouched by events and hurts. Our eternal self is always safe and unchanged. But our perceptions in this world say otherwise. Our mind creates nightmares of reality that have no substance but can restrain us as if we were in actual chains. Jeff’s mind and perceptions held him captive — NOT the doctors, NOT his ex-wife. Jeff was unable to accept God’s miracle because at a deeper level he felt unworthy of His Love.
We see in the story of the prodigal son, where the young man had been a squanderer and profligate with his inheritance. He eventually returned home battered, ashamed and in fear of reprisal and in spite of all this, he knew he had nowhere else to go. Yet, he was met by his father with open welcoming arms. He was not met with judgement or criticism, but love. The allegory is clear. He came home to God and to himself.
Forgiveness creates health and unburdens the spirit. It refreshes the soul and is the key to peace of mind, peace in the body and peace in our spirit.
Self forgiveness remembers that deep inside … you know whose child you are. This is stated beautifully in A Course in Miracles:
God is the Love in which you forgive yourself.
God is the Love with which you love yourself.
God is the Love in which you are blessed.